Sex Talk: How to choose an intimate gift

What the report says

The Observer’s “Sex Talk” column focuses on how couples can choose intimate gifts that feel personal rather than following a trend. The piece opens by noting common complaints from men who receive practical items such as socks and underwear, while some women are said to have shifted to gifting car tyres. The columnist argues that gifts should reflect a partner’s preferences instead of assuming that expensive or conventional presents will always be appreciated.

Using anecdotal examples, the article describes a husband who repeatedly bought perfumes and jewellery for his wife, only to find them unused. After he began giving cash and gift vouchers instead, the columnist says the response changed noticeably. The article also mentions other relationship gestures, such as a partner cooking a special meal or a spouse initiating sex, as examples of actions that can feel more meaningful than store-bought items.

The main point is that gift-giving can affect relationship closeness, including intimacy, when it shows understanding of a spouse’s taste and needs. The column suggests that couples who pay attention to each other’s habits, interests and reactions are more likely to choose gifts that are appreciated. It closes by urging readers to observe and listen carefully so the right present can emerge naturally, rather than relying on generic options.